all God's children are unique

Yesterday afternoon the three older children were in their music school's Christmas recital. It seems that every day someone tells me, "Your children all look so much alike," but it struck me during the performance how emotionally they are so different. Maggie eagerly practiced The Mermaid by Faber over and over from the time we got home from Mass to the moment we got in the van. I was thoroughly sick of listening to it, but she performed it flawlessly and sported a huge grin before practically skipping back down the aisle. Mary practiced The Queen's Harpsichord by George as few times as possible beforehand and was so nervous before she walked up to the grand piano that she refused to sit with us and had a blotchy face from a sudden crying nervous spell. She only hesitated one time during her performance and escaped from the sight of strangers as soon as possible. Will practiced Jingle Bells by Pierpont enough to know he could play it at a normal speed (his teacher constantly has to urge him to slow down from warp speed) and played it flawlessly, but I was disappointed by the slight scowl on his face during the walk back to his seat.

Of course the other three children are each different in personality as well, keeping me on my toes to encourage and discipline each one in a way that is effective. This is the biggest challenge in raising and homeschooling a large brood, what works for one child doesn't necessarily work for another and each requires an intimate knowledge to attempt to help them grow into saints. Our efforts sometimes are lacking, but in realizing that each child is a unique soul is the first step in achieving success.  

musical events

In addition to the children's music lessons, I want to expose them to listening to live music, but even cheap tickets end up costing too much with 7 of us attending a performance. After reading the local paper I learned that some of the churches downtown offer a variety of classical music once a month from handbells to choir. Today we got most of the schoolwork completed before we heading out to hear a pianist and violinist give an hour long free concert. The violinist wouldn't have earned a spot in the Virginia Philharmonic, but the children did learn that playing a stringed instrument is far more difficult than the piano. I ended up standing in the back with the little children, but since it doesn't seem fair to the older ones to miss out on all cultural experiences because they have a host of younger siblings we just do the best we can. To reward everyone's cooperativeness, we stopped at Pizza Hut for a couple of free pizzas through the Book It! program and had a picnic in the park.   

pluck, pluck, pluck

No, we haven't gotten chickens on our little 1/2 acre suburban plot, but Mary has begun violin lessons. The child has been begging me for almost a year to let her take lessons, though I think her idea was to switch from piano to violin, where my compromise was for her to try out violin for 3 months in addition to piano. As I was telling the ladies at Bunko about it, the hostess pulled a case out of the closet and handed it to me. I don't know what Mary's musical future is, but I do know what her writing assignment on Monday morning will be: a lovely thank you note for a beautiful violin she can grow into.   

working vacation

Before we drove up to Maine, I found a piano teacher in town and made arrangements for them to continue lessons sporadically during the summer. Will was complaining about how much harder Miss Ellen is than their former teacher, "She expects 3 times as much!" I understand their frustration, but I know that they have made progress in even the few weeks this month. Maggie and I sat down together every day this past week because she had to say the note names aloud as she played each of her 6 pieces. The first day she cried the entire 30 minutes, but the next day I resorted to attitude medicine: smartie candies that I popped in her mouth if she said the notes well. The difference was phenomenal and by Monday's practice she only had to play each one 2 times to show me her skill.

I have to say that I have learned how to read most of the notes without having to resort to my cheat sheet that Will made for me. She still mixes up B and D sometimes (D dangles off the treble clef), but she is still faster than I am and is playing the right key at the same time. This is homeschooling: learning together and making adjustments in the best way to teach each child to help them achieve their goals.

piano recital success

Yesterday we bypassed the traffic on the Beltway (thank you Tim for insisting we go the back way, otherwise we would have missed the entire performance) and attended the 3 older children's final piano recital in Maryland. Tim had to hold Julia Ellen in the back and scoot out the door constantly to keep her from babbling, but the little boys were very well behaved (they certainly have a lot of practice every Sunday during Mass).

Maggie was the first to play and I could see her talking with her teacher, "No, I don't need my music, I've got it down pat!" She exhibits no fear or nervousness, which is a stark contrast to Mary, who won't say boo to a goose without me holding her hand. Mary was in a trio next, the girls claim they didn't coordinate their outfits, but they were all wearing pink floral dresses, which made for a lovely scene. She was calm and poised when it was her turn to play alone, her long fingers just danced over the keys, but she was obviously glad to be finished. Will played Minuet in G very well, but if I'm threatening him that if I hear Jelly Bean Jump one more time I'm going to jump right out the window. I recall feeling the same way last year about another piece, but I made the mistake of mentioning it to Will and so now he still plays Ghost Ship every day to torture me (not exactly the same experience as being waterboarded, but...).

Afterwards we rewarded the children with dinner out and ice cream cones afterwards. We aren't quite finished with music here, the theory test is today and the children have one more lesson before the movers put our piano on the truck. They really have learned a great deal over the past 2 years and their recital last night proves it.

the kid can dance

None of my children, thank goodness, have shown any interest in pop music, rolling up the window if some thug wanna-be with a pavement vibrating stereo pulls up next to us at the stop light. Will and Mary set their alarm clocks on the local classic music station and often ask me to play Beethoven's Wig CD set their Auntie Cheryl bought them for Christmas.

However, Mary and I had a blast standing in an aisle of Safeway the other night opening and closing the plethora of musical cards on display. Timmy received a Thomas the Tank engine card for Valentine's Day last year and drove us nuts playing it over and over for months, but we couldn't resist buying Julia Ellen one that might be an even bigger hit. For a mere $5 we get to see the baby bounce and smile her way through the old wedding hit, The Chicken Dance. Watching reminds me of the youtube video featuring a baby bouncing to Beyonce, but accordion music is about as cutting edge as we get around here.

let's make noise!

A box of macaroni and cheese makes a very good maraca, though it isn't the best accompaniment to Bach's Minuet in G.

a host of compliments

Every week I look through our weekly paper for cultural opportunities, but am not inclined to shell out $$ for tired plays, travel over an hour for children's shows, or shuffle around a bunch of wine-drinking snobs at gallery openings. Since we have been up in Maine we have visited the aviation museum, the Penobscot Indian museum, a classical music concert, and last night went to an organ concert.

St. John's Catholic Church in Bangor boasts of a 1860 pipe organ and a very talented organist. While the pieces selected were a little too Russian (think melancholic and depressed composers trapped on the steppes in winter), it was good to hear what a magnificent instrument play something more elevated than "Gather Us In," and it was good practice for the children to sit still and listen. They have had a lot of practice at this since we usually attend the Traditional Latin Mass which requires much sitting, standing, and kneeling while being silent.

I combined the trip with a visit to the city's library which boasts an impressive children's collection. We then hit Dysarts for supper with the promise (or bribe) that we would return for ice cream sundaes after the music if they were good. Two waitresses (one with her own brood of 5) said how well behaved the children were during the meal and another patron caught me on the way up to the cashier, saying, "I have to tell you how impressed I am by your children. They have been so good." With an hour to kill beforehand I spied a park near the church and gave them the chance to yell, roll down a hill, climb on the swingset, and wrestle. This free time might have been what saved us since it was already approaching bedtimes as we entered the sanctuary. Julia Ellen was the surprising "naughty" child, screwing up her face and threatening to let out a howl every few seconds during the first piece. She wouldn't nurse until I finally realized that the low and loud organ sounds were too much for her tiny ears. I moved over to the stairs leading to the basement and fed her almost to sleep. The little boys were squirmy as they could only be given the circumstances. During the last 15 minutes I took them downstairs and let them silently run around the parish hall. Afterwards we took a close up look at the organ itself and reaped a few more comments from attendees, all positive.

When we streamed back into the truck stop restaurant several of the ladies said, "They must have been good!" Julia Ellen slept soundly while we shoveled ice cream into our mouths, traded maraschino cherries, and gulped down cups of ice water. Another round of compliments followed us out the door and we decided to attempt this outing again next summer, with the promise of dessert for obedient little boys and girls.

Force feeding a cultural education

Last Monday night we drove into Bangor (the “big” city) and went to an evening concert hosted by Kneisel Hall, a Blue Hill summer program for young talented musicians. Now, any parent of small children will state that evening activities, especially ones that involve being quiet are bad ideas. But I really wanted Will and Mary to see Emely Phelps, a prize-winning pianist, currently studying at The Julliard School. The options were to take everyone and pray for good behavior or forget the whole idea. Until 20 minutes before we left the house I wasn’t sure we going to go, but Timmy had a long nap so we changed into nice clothes after supper and hit the road.

After arriving at the church, we sat next to the door off to the side so I had a quick escape route in case of noise or bathroom emergency. A lady came over and graciously asked if the baby was a quiet one, “Oh yes, she is very good and I will cut out if she fusses.” I didn’t take offense, but put myself in the position of the musicians who have practiced and studied for weeks to learn their pieces. I certainly wouldn’t want to spoil the concert with 6 loud, unruly children. Will of course paid perfect attention to the concert while the others were much less interested. Why I folded a copy of Mother Earth News magazine (I only read it for the articles and try not to go ballistic over the enviro-wacko anti-child editiorals) into my purse I don’t know, but it is likely that it saved the evening for over a hundred people. Charlie spent an hour examining each photo within, spending most of his time on the tractor ads. All anyone heard from our pew was a little gurgle from Julia Ellen before I started nursing and a faint repeating hiccup afterwards. The first trio played pieces by Haydn for 20 minutes and the second group (a string quartet) played Mendelssohn’s #6 for 40 minutes. The wiggling and shuffling was getting more noticeable so I made an executive decision to cut our attendance short and head out during the intermission.



A good plan for both a comedian or parent is to always leave them wanting more, the audience that is. Several folks complimented the children’s behavior as we scooted through the crowd, but I knew that if we had stayed we would have ended up leaving in disgrace.


I recall a discussion a few months back on someone's blog about rewarding the children when they are praised by strangers (for their behavior, not their looks) and I felt that they certainly deserved a treat so when we were all strapped in the van I said, “Sundaes at Dysarts!” Even though it was way past their bedtime I was very impressed by their manners and consider the outing a great success.


It occurred to me while we were listening to the beautiful music that I was in a similar position to those young adults in a way. They worked and practiced every day for years to be able to play difficult scores and make it appear effortless, while I have worked, endlessly it seems, for over a decade to have children who can be trusted to sit quietly in church. All the Masses standing in the vestibule, bribing the children with doughnuts, training them in the proper behavior made it look easy. I can’t say that it will be clear sailing from here on out, but this outing would have deemed impossible only a few years ago. So, for those with only little children I give you hope that one day you will be able to listen to the beauty of Mass with few distractions, at least from your own pew.

piano recital

Yesterday we all dressed up and drove down to the local Unitarian church (which, from the snapshots on the wall, seems to be where only chubby middle-aged pantheists worship) and watched Will and Mary participate. From little 7 year old Sarah to high school senior Alec (who has been taking lessons for 12 years) the kids were all impressive. All the children also scored honors on the Maryland Piano Teachers music theory test.

I asked some of the other moms at dinner the other evening if they thought that more homeschoolers play musical instruments than public school kids. They seemed to think so, especially since several of us were getting ready for spring recitals. Mary played Sonatina in C by Costly and March of the Wee Folk by Gaynor before playing Alligator Blues by Bastien in a duet. Will played Gavotte by Bach and The Clown by Kabalevsky (his teacher said he learned this faster than any child she has taught) before playing Rondo Capriccio by Beethoven in a duet with his friend John.

Everyone was impressed by Charlie and Timmy who sat for the entire hour without saying a word or making a noise. As for Julia Ellen? She fell asleep in her daddy's arms and certainly didn't ruin her outfit, which she did to me twice the day before at the IHM Conference.